Math Smath Even I Could Teach it

The Present at Habitat For Humanity October 18/2012...

Peter, the Project Manager: Any problems with the measurements?
Shelley: Not at all. I was just finishing this measurement.... and this one is...  36 inches and 6/10ths.

Peter: 6/10ths? Well if you look here, you'll see that with inches, there are only 8ths, or 16ths or 32s.
Shelley: (Really?) Whoops! Oh Ha! Ha! Ha! Of course it does. I was thinking in metric. Would you believe that I used to teach math?

Peter: I bet you were AWESOME.


Math Flashback #1...
Shelley: So, Grade 7's, what we have, so far, when we divide 3 by 7 is:

0.428571428571428571428571428571428571428571428571428571428571428571428571428571

(OMG! This division problem has gone the entire width of the blackboard and there is no end in sight. @#$^!!!! I don't think I wrote down the same number I memorized last night when I was preparing... . How do I get out of this?) 
Joe?
Grade 7 class: He's out today Mrs. Smith
 Shelley: (@#$%!!! Out sick today. Hmmm... Going to have to go with Amy, the second best math student in the class.) Amy, what do you think we should do here?
Amy: You should draw a repeating notation, or a line if you will,  above the repeating sequence.
Shelley:(A what?) Very good Amy. That is correct.

And Math Flashback #2... 
The Grade 5 teacher I am going to take over for in one day: Shelley, could you please call over one student at a time and help them review for tomorrow's math quiz?
Shelley: (WHAT?? A MATH QUIZ??? ) Of course. Hey Freddy. Ready for your math quiz tomorrow?
Freddy: Not really. I can't remember the difference between a scalene and an isosceles triangle? Can you help me?
Shelley: (Huh??!!) Not a problem. Why don't we open the book to the geometry section? There we go.... Just one momento....  Hmmm... Aha GOT IT... Freddy, I want you to look closely at the scalene triangle. Describe this triangle to me.

Freddy:... One of the sides is always longer than the other two?
Shelley: Exactly. How many "S's" are there in the word "scalene?"
Freddy: One.
Shelley: So the one "S" in the word "Scalene" means that one side is longer than the others. Does that help you remember?
Freddy: It does! Thanks. But what about the isosceles triangle?
Shelley: Look at the isosceles triangle. Describe it to me.

Freddy: Two sides are equal in length.
Shelley: Correct. And since isosceles has two S's in it's...
Freddy: It's easy to remember. Thanks so much Mrs. Smith. You're an awesome math teacher.
Shelley: Why thank you. Sally? Now what can I do for you?..............  And Sally, since isosceles has two S's in it, it's easy to remember. Got it?
Sally:.... But... Mrs. Smith, doesn't isosceles have three S's in it?
Mrs. Smith: (@#$%!!!!) Not if you cover up the last S with your thumb. Next!

The Present at Habitat For Humanity October 18/2012...
Shelley:... Of course I was awesome Peter...  Here you go John, measured and cut perfectly, 36 and 6/10ths.

Shelley and John

All I Really Need to Know, I Learned While Volunteering for Habitat for Humanity in Courtenay, BC Canada

What "I" learned while volunteering for Habitat for Humanity.

You get to wear cool pink helmets.

Your hot pink tool belt has a compartment for your hot pink lip gloss.

John is not

 the only stud.

These are toe nails. 

So are these.

This is a header.

 As is this.

This is a crown.

So is this.

A hammer stapler works best if

you hammer with the correct side.

Measure twice.

Cut once. 

                              Being on the roof is scary.

This should be scary!

One volunteer...  good.

Two volunteers... better.

Six volunteers... the best.

Hammering is fun,

 unless 

you 

 hit 

your thumb, 

 not once,

 but,

 twice, resulting in 

  going to your

brother-in-law, Shenley's house

so, he can take a sterilized needle and, 

drill not one, not two but, three, yes, drill three holes into your thumb nail 

in order to relieve

 the pressure and, 

take away the pain.

 Shelley and John
PS: John's thumb after our second day.