Thursday, December 29, 2011

Smith Christmas Tradition #3 How to Take the Perfect Family Christmas Photo

Back Row: Shenley, Matt, Tyler, Logan, Andrew, Dan, John, Shannon and Keith
Front Row: Shelley, Marina, Ash

We just finished Christmas dinner.  What could be a better time than to take the perfect family Christmas photo?

Plain type - Dialogue
Bold Type - Thoughts

My Sister Shannon: Hey! This would be a great time to take the perfect family Christmas photo. Who wants to take it?

My Brother Shenley: I’ll take it with Marina’s new camera! (No. No! NO! What have I done? Look at what they did to John last night when he tried to organize a game. He lost it - ended up throwing custard and swearing!)

Everyone but Shenley: Yayyyyy!!!!! Thanks Shen.

Shenley: (Ahhhhh. That was nice. Maybe I underestimated them. This "will" be a great chance to use this awesome new camera!) Everyone go into the living room in stand in front of the fire. Guys in the back. Girls in the front...... Andrew. What are you doing?

Everyone, including Shenley: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shenley: But, come on now, get off the table. Get in the back. That was pretty funny by the way. So, it’s looking ....

Everyone but Shenley: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shenley: Matt. What’s on your head?

Matt: Uh.. a Christmas hat?

Sister-in law Marina: Take it off. This is supposed to be the "Perfect family Christmas Photo."

Matt: I thought we were celebrating Christmas. Why was Andrew funny and I wasn’t??

Marina and Shenley: Just take it off, Matt.

Andrew: Because I'm the funny one, Matt!

Everyone but Matt: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shenley: Ha! OK. OK. A perfect photo now. (Are you kidding me? Now it's John. What is wrong with the Smiths?) Stop! John, why are you standing like that?

John: Sorry. I was trying to be taller than the boys.

Everyone but Shenley: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shenley:  (Why is he messing around?  What have I ever done to him? I even felt sorry for him last night. Doesn't he want the perfect family Christmas photo?)

Marina: Stop it. Everyone just stand nicely and not on your toes. It doesn’t matter who's the tallest. I want the "Perfect family Christmas Photo."

Shenley: (Thank God for Marina.) OK. Looking good. Leave a space for me. I’m putting the timer on..........checking one last time........ (Seriously? Seriously!) Why are you boys ducking ? 

Cousins and Sons: No we weren't.

Everyone but Shenley: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shenley: .........(They are pinching and grabbing each other! I am going to kill one of them!..... Which one is first?...... OMG! What am I thinking? I've got to get a grip.......Smile. SMILE SHENLEY! DON'T LET THEM KNOW THEY ARE GETTING TO YOU!!!!) Oh! Ha! That is just too funny. Ha. Smile everyone. Let me just check..........(THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE! WHY DID I GIVE THIS CAMERA TO MARINA?) 
TYLER! WHY ARE YOU STANDING OVER THERE? YOU ARE NOT IN THE PICTURE!!!!!

Cousin Tyler: But dad, you told me to stand there.

Matt: Hey! Why do they get to wear Christmas hats and I don’t?

Shenley: TYLER!!!! I.... DID.... NOT!!!  JUST GO BACK OVER THERE!!! (@$%^!!!) 
OK. Everyone ready? Look at the camera. Stop moving. STOP (@$%^ing) MOVING!!!! JUST LOOK AT THE (@$%^ing) CAMERA (WHICH I NOW @$%^ing HATE) SO WE CAN GET THE  (@$%^ing PERFECT (@$%^ing*) FAMILY CHRISTMAS PHOTO!!!!

Everyone but Shenley: Ha! Ha! Ha!

Shenley: That’s it. I’m putting away the camera.

Everyone but Shenley: Why? What’s wrong?

Shenley: If you think that I'm doing this for another 30 minutes. You're wrong. Dead wrong.

Everyone but Shelley:.....................................
Sister Shannon, sister-in-law, Marina, Shelley (me)

Shelley: Ha! Ha! Come on Shenley. How about for 32 minutes? Ha! Ha!

Everyone but Shenley and Shelley: (HOLY %&#$!!! SHELLEY JUST POKED THE BEAR!!! WHERE HAS SHE BEEN FOR THE LAST 30 MINUTES? HOW MUCH HAS "SHE" HAD TO DRINK???) 

Shenley: (HOLY %&#$!!! SHELLEY JUST POKED ME!!!  WHERE HAS SHE BEEN FOR THE LAST 30 MINUTES? HOW MUCH HAS "SHE" HAD TO DRINK???)............................................... No.

Everyone but Shenley: Come on Shenley!

Shenley: ......................

Everyone but Shenley: We’ll listen! We’re sorry! 

Shenley: ......................................................................................................................Smile.



Merry Christmas everyone!

Love

Back Row: Shenley, Matt, Tyler, Logan, Andrew, Dan, John, Shannon and Keith
Front Row: Shelley, Marina, Ash


PS: Thanks for the cartoons, Matt!

Shelley and John